“Have mercy on me, O God, according to thy steadfast love; according to thy abundant mercy blot out my transgressions. Wash me thoroughly from my iniquity, and cleanse me from my sin! For I know my transgressions, and my sin is ever before me. Against thee, thee only, have I sinned and done that which is evil in thy sight.” (Psalm 51:1-4a, ESV)
No one is exempt from the possibility of moral and spiritual catastrophe. Consider King David, “a man after God’s own heart.” Scripture calls him the hero of Israel, the singer of God’s songs of praise and trust and confidence. But as we see in the beginning of Psalm 51, he committed evil.
For followers of Jesus, part of our task is vigilance, staying alive to the ongoing presence and power of Christ. In The Imitation of Christ, we are cautioned. “There is no worse enemy, nor one more troublesome to the soul, than thou art to thyself, if thou be not in harmony with the Spirit. So much negligent in things inward and spiritual; so prompt to ease and pleasures of the flesh, so dull to strictness of life and zeal; so curious to hear news and to see beautiful sights, so slack to embrace what is humble and low; so inconsiderate in speech, so reluctant to keep silence; so uncomposed in manners, so fretful in action; so eager about food, so deaf to the word of God.” Thomas à Kempis concludes his litany: “Make thou a firm resolution always to be amending thy life.”
Following Christ, seeking to imitate him, is everyday business. For most of us, outright betrayal in our Christian walk is not common to our experience – but denial is. Peter could tell us about that. He loved Jesus, wanting to be faithful; and the pressure was great. In the courtyard, the Galilean woman recognized his accent, confronting him. Peter denied knowing his friend. In fact, he repeated it three times.
That’s when the rooster crowed, and that’s when a bomb went off in Peter’s mind. Jesus had warned him. That kind of dramatic denial is probably not part of our experience. But hardly a day passes for most of us when we do not deny in one way or another. It comes in our failure to live out our discipleship daily, paying attention to our attitudes, our sensitivity to others.
Making daily examination a regular practice is essential: asking ourselves questions like, “did I fail in relationship with others – to love, care, understand, listen, support? Did I stand by when someone maligned the character of another? Did I fail to lend my moral weight to a cause of righteousness? When did I have the opportunity to share Christ but failed to do so?”
The Imitation warns and guides us, “Know that the old enemy doth strive by all means to hinder thy desire to good, and to divert thee from all religious exercises. Many thoughts does he suggest to thee, that so he may cause a wearisomeness and horror in thee to call thee back from prayer and holy reading. No man doth safely appear abroad, but he who abides at home. No man doth safely speak but he that is glad to hold his peace. No man doth safely rule, but he that hath learned gladly to obey. Seek a convenient time of leisure for thyself, and meditate often upon God’s loving kindness. If thou desirest true contrition of heart, enter into thy secret chamber and shut out the tumults of the world.”
Daily self-examination is an essential discipline, and we must make it a habit.
Moment of Reflection: In what ways do you practice self-examination?
Prayer: Lord Jesus, burn through my coldness with the fire of your love. Amen.
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