My family was not long on formality. To say that we were “casual” may be an understatement. Warmth of the relationship and the caring of my parents is what I remember most. How we related to and treated another, whether formal or casual, is what mattered.
That was especially demonstrated in our eating together. We called our evening meal “supper” not “dinner.” When we sat down for supper, we always had a prayer before we started eating. You might label that a formality; if so, it was a good formality. After prayer, either Momma or Daddy would say, “Now help yourselves.” Persons would begin serving themselves from the food closest at hand, and passing it on to another person. Throughout the meal, you heard, “Pass the peas,” or “Could I have some more slaw?” I’m a bit mystified as I remember that everyone finished the meal at about the same time.
Lately, I’ve been pondering that invitation, “Now help yourself.” That invitation was appropriate in our family because on the table there was enough for all of us to help ourselves. There may not have been many choices, but there was enough of what was there.
There are many supper tables all over our nation at which parents can’t say to their children, supper tonight, “Now, help yourself.” Some are not even fortunate enough to offer a little.
As wealthy as our nation is, poverty is a fact of life. Using the accepted understanding, 12.8% of the people of our country live in poverty; in Tennessee, it is 14.6%; in Memphis, 24.6%. Child poverty is 39.6%. That means many children will go to bed hungry tonight.
For me that means I’m going to be more sensitive about what taxes I complain about, because I know some of my taxes are providing meals for children at school. I also am going to become more aware of and support ministries like “Meals on Wheels.”
Also, I will not say about someone or some group, “they ought to help themselves.” What if they can’t?